MY VIRTUAL CHILD

CAIDEN APOLLO AT 8 YEARS OLD

Caiden Apollo's older cousin has finished a tour of duty in the armed services and shares many pictures and stories of her experiences in Asia with your family. Caiden Apollo is very interested in hearing about other places and looking them up on the map.

1. Caiden Apollo's talent and interest in math has suddenly improved. It blossomed under the instruction of a great 3rd grade teacher who handles math for grades 3 and 4. The teacher has seen this happen before, and believes it involves bi-directional influences from the child and the environment.

You try to facilitate things by urging Caiden Apollo to make extra efforts when a problem seems too hard, and praising his efforts.

•         We want to train our son and urge him to never give up because there’s more to come especially with the subject Math and even though it is not Caiden’s weakness, we will help him and give him praises to his efforts and also to find a good teacher who will help him with his subjects.

For some reason you and your partner are arguing more and more lately. You have found that you don't see eye to eye on a number of issues, such as the balance of work and home, and the desire to spend money and have fun vs. saving for the future. Sometimes the quarreling gets so bad that one of you has to leave the apartment for a couple of hours until things calm down. You are both regretful when it happens, because the kids get less attention and affection.

2. Caiden Apollo is generally pretty good about homework and chores, but sometimes forgets, or leaves them unfinished.

You scold him when this happens and threaten to remove privileges.

•         As parents, it is very important to discipline our child especially when it comes to his education. We will scold him if he will leave his assignment and chores because it is his task and responsibility to work on those. We will do this not because we are maltreating him but because we are giving the discipline that he needs in order for him to learn and understand.

Caiden Apollo has enjoyed soccer and baseball on and off over the past two seasons, and is not sure whether to continue. He did not have tremendous success with either one, but seemed to enjoy the social aspects of the team sport. You figure that age 8 is a good time to explore different sports so you let him pick another sport. He decides to stick with baseball after all. Both parents support his decision and try to be as involved as they can.

3. Caiden Apollo likes the role of big brother and plays with Leticia Salvacion quite a bit in the yard on the weekends when friends are not available. It's usually a construction project (such as building a fort or cabin out of old boxes), or whatever sport Caiden Apollo is most interested in playing (little sisters don't have a lot of choice!).

You ask Caiden Apollo to let his sister decide on some of the activities, and encourage them to play with some of his little sister's toys, games, and dolls. This doesn't go over very well, but you think it's important to do once in a while!

•         Sometimes Caiden should let his sister lead the play or let his sister choose something to play with, it’ll be a good training for them to have an equal play and equal rights as siblings. We will tell Caiden to also listen to his youngest sister’s suggestions or what ever she wants so that his sister could also have a good decision and will not be able to feel being at the bottom all the time.

4. Caiden Apollo seems to be able to eat a lot without gaining any weight.

You figure Caiden Apollo is too young to learn about diet and nutrition, so you control what he eats at home, making sure it is balanced and not too fattening.

•         As parents, the health of our children is very important to us. With the case of Caiden and with his age, we will not try to have him on a diet, instead we will look out on his eating habits and just let him eat the right food for example vegetables, fruits and a little amount of pork and lessen the soft drinks and more on healthy juices and more importantly water. We will just control what he eats and avoid the junk foods.

5. You decide it is time for a family pet, so you:

Go to the animal shelter and pick out a puppy.

•         The puppy is the right pet for us and aside that the dog is the man’s best friend, it will be a good guard around the house. We decided to have a puppy because our children would be very interested to it especially that puppies are very entertaining and very loving and can really protect us.

6. Caiden Apollo is very cooperative with the teacher, and has a small group of friends at school and one friend in the neighborhood. He is still a bit shy and is not the leader of the group, but is well liked.

You want to Caiden Apollo to overcome the shyness, so you encourage him to take part in a children's play. Initially he is terrified of speaking, but the director is a patient and relaxed person, and Caiden Apollo gradually begins to feel more at ease.

•         We really want Caiden to overcome his shyness and to have a self confidence especially in talking or giving out some speech. We’ll encourage him to play with his playmates and have an acting kind of play so that Caiden can improve his talking skills and to practice him to speak in front of many people. With that he will have a self confidence and to increase his talking skills.

7. Caiden Apollo is doing reasonably well in 3rd grade math, but doesn't seem to like math all that much. He seems to like the hands on science experiments most of all.

He is motivated to get his name up on the classroom chart of "Magic Multipliers", so both parents help him practice doing 25 multiplication problems in under one minute.

•         We will let him focus on his Math skills and although he works so good already in Math but doesn’t like that much, we will just help him to love Math & of course tell him to also give an importance to his favorite field the science experiments and in relation to his math skills we will test him how fast he can solve the problems and at the same time, motivate him with his experiment skills and conduct a simple experiment activity at home.

8. Caiden Apollo goes to a school assembly and comes home all excited saying he wants to take part in the instrumental music program at the school. You like this idea, so you and Caiden Apollo try out the available instruments at the music store, and decide on:

The saxophone.

•         It is very exciting to try something new and it is because playing the saxophone is very rare for children it will be a good idea to let him learn how to play this so that he can also try something that is very rare with his age. Playing the saxophone is such a unique talent because it is quite hard for an eight year old boy to play this so he will be motivated to also try something that is hard and in a unique way.

9. Caiden Apollo seems to be about average for his age at drawing and building things.

One of your hobbies is painting, so you show Caiden Apollo some of the basics and provide the materials. You spend some time together painting in the garage and have a good time.

•         As parents it is our responsibility to teach Caiden and to add something to what he knew like for example in painting skills, he has already an idea so all I have to do is to teach him more and add up and this will also be a great bonding between us and Caiden. I will show Caiden something I learned before and let him apply it and motivate him.

10. Since second grade, Caiden Apollo has been able to sound out almost any word, and now only occasionally gets stuck when reading aloud. He enjoys reading and looks forward to taking turns reading the story for the night with you.

You introduce Caiden Apollo to some different kinds of reading materials, such as children's literary magazines, nature magazines, newspaper stories that might be of interest, and poetry books.

•         Reading is very important to an eight year old, we will provide more books and let him read and let him tell the story so that we will see how his mind works while reading. Also, we will look out on his pronunciation and correct them if he mispronounced the word.

11. Caiden Apollo and his friends spend a lot of their time playing sports, roughhousing, or roaming the neighborhood on bikes and skateboards. They rarely play with girls, but Caiden Apollo seems more tolerant of girls than many of the other boys.

You ask that Caiden Apollo reserve some of his free time to play with Leticia Salvacion, and he generally is willing to play with her in the evenings and sometimes on weekends if none of his friends are around.

•         Caiden should spend more of his time with his sister so that they will have a good bonding with each other. We will tell him that as a brother it is also his obligation to look out and love his sister and to be with Leticia when she needs him. They should have a strong bond and unity as siblings. Caiden should protect his sister and be a good role model to her.

12. Sometimes Caiden Apollo doesn't want to go to school in the morning, and at other times, he is unwilling to go to after-school activities. When you ask what the problem is, Caiden Apollo is usually not able to explain.

You think Caiden Apollo might be having trouble with friends at school. You start casually asking about certain friends or about his school day, and listen if he has a problem to discuss. You also invite the friends over and observe to see if there are any problems and any way you can help.

•         It is our concern as parents that our son doesn’t want  to go to school  and it is a very big problem. We will try to monitor him in school and observe him very well and also asking his friends might be a good help. And after that we will talk to Caiden at home and ask him what are his difficulties because we might help him with it. 

13. Caiden Apollo does OK in language arts at school, but doesn't spontaneously do any writing outside of school assignments.

You try to help by going over his writing for school and praising it, but also correcting spelling and suggesting some better word choices.

•         We will help him with his writing skills especially in spelling and how to construct a sentence and at home we will give him some activities such as compositions and have a spelling game and after that reward him something like food, new toys and hugs and kisses. Giving praises to our son would also be good so that he will be motivated and be able to focus on his writing skills.

Caiden Apollo is cheating less often at games (or has gotten sneakier about it!), but recently he has been lying about things that happen at school, or blaming messes on his sister. You realize that Caiden Apollo is still at the preconventional level of moral development. You tell Caiden Apollo stories or fables about people who lied ("The Boy Who Cried Wolf"), and talk about how people feel when other people lie to them. When Caiden Apollo does occasionally confess, you praise him for telling the truth.

Caiden Apollo is very busy this summer. He starts a lot of activities but doesn't always finish them.

You get a call from a long lost friend from college. She visits and her two kids have fun playing with your two kids!

Both parents are looking forward to the upcoming summer and spending more relaxing time with the kids. Both kids are also getting anxious for school to end.

Both parents were interested in having a relatively complete psychological test report done on Caiden Apollo some time in middle childhood and this seems like a good time. You take advantage of the local university's service of providing inexpensive psychological testing and counseling by psychology interns who are supervised by an experienced clinical psychologist. You have the report done toward the end of summer, just before Caiden Apollo turns 9.

Time passes. Caiden Apollo continues living life.

14. Caiden Apollo has one friend who seems to be pretty free to hang out this summer and a couple of others who are available from time to time.

You let the friends come over, as long as Caiden Apollo promises to straighten up (over the weekend) the areas of the house they have used during the week.

•         We will also let Caiden hang out as long as he accomplish the tasks especially to clear up the areas they have used during the weekend. It is also important to know Caiden’s circle of friends so that he will be safe in times of hang outs.

Psychologist's report at age 8:

His scores were in the average to above average range in word reading, reading fluency, phonological awareness and spelling. He was quiet and reserved with the examiner. He seemed a little nervous during the testing, particularly on the harder items, but remained cooperative and hard-working throughout the IQ and achievement testing. These were some of Caiden Apollo's scores on the Verbal portion of the Wechsler Intelligence Scale for Children (where 7 is one standard deviation below the mean, 10 is the mean and 13 is one standard deviation above the mean): Information (9), Vocabulary (10), Similarities (10), Comprehension (11). Caiden Apollo's scores on the math concepts, math application problems, and math computation tests were in the average range.

Caiden Apollo's scores on tests of visual-spatial ability (spatial rotation, copying of designs, etc.) were in the average range. The psychologist gave you and the teacher a questionnaire on behavioral and attentional problems, and reported that Caiden Apollo did not have unusual problems with impulsivity, inattentiveness or hyperactivity. He was very focused and maintained concentration throughout the IQ and achievement testing.

The psychologist interviews you using a standard set of questions about parenting attitudes. According to your scores, you are about average in warmth and affection toward your child. Your scores on the parenting questionnaire indicates you are in the top 15% in discipline and control toward your child.

Mary Laurenz J. Barbaton, Ryan Cordova, Edel Rose Rivera

BSPT-2C